Saturday, December 5, 2015

How to give a Pill to a Cat

1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered Doulton figurines from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

13. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed, force cat's mouth open with small wrench. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of Filet Mignon. Hold head vertically and pour 1/2 liter of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture store on way home to order new table.

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Edna St. Vincent Millay, 1892 - 1950

Travel

 
The railroad track is miles away, 
    And the day is loud with voices speaking, 
Yet there isn’t a train goes by all day 
    But I hear its whistle shrieking.
 
All night there isn’t a train goes by, 
    Though the night is still for sleep and dreaming, 
But I see its cinders red on the sky, 
    And hear its engine steaming.
 
My heart is warm with friends I make, 
    And better friends I’ll not be knowing; 
Yet there isn’t a train I wouldn’t take, 
    No matter where it’s going.
 
 

MIDDLE AGE TEXTING CODES

MIDDLE AGE TEXTING CODES:
 
ATD:      at the Doctor
BFF:       best friend fell
BTW:      bring the wheelchair
BYOT:    bring your own teeth
FWIW:    forgot where I was
GGPBL:  gotta go, pacemaker battery low
GHA:       got heartburn again
LMDO:    laughing my dentures out
IMHO:     is my hearing aid on?
OMMR:   on my massage recliner
TTYL:     talk to you louder
ROFLACGU:
                Rolling on the floor laughing and can’t get up

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

It rained finally.


Nov. 3, 2015

  Yesterday, in Ukiah, we had our first substantial rainfall.  It wasn’t much but it did let me know that there are a few areas that I need patching up on my trailer such as one of my windows is leaking and needs a sealant over the top of it.  Our County Fair finally closed its doors this week to the rescue of Lake County Valley Fire.  There is so much left to be done over there that the ‘mop up’ is going to take years to get it back to normality.  The three fires that took a little under two months to consume a total of 170,683 acres or a total of over 284+ square miles of Lake County decimated 1,400 homes and killed 4 civilians and put 4 firefighters in the hospital.  One is still in the hospital.

  For any that don’t recognize how devastating the Valley Fire was (is), let me give you a brief rundown of how the Fire started and what a tragedy it has left.  On the 12th of September at around 2 P.M. I saw 5 Borate Bombers (fire retardant bombers; S-2 Trackers) take off from our airport just 2 miles away.  It’s not really unusual to see 1 or 2 leave and usually that’s all we have stationed at the Ukiah airport.  But when 5 took off, 1 after another I became concerned, especially after Lake County had had 2 massive fires already.  I quickly learned that they were going over to Cobb Mountain, a mountain just a couple of miles away over the ridge in Lake County.  By 7 P.M or there about the fire has scorched 50,000 acres, an unprecedented amount of land.   It was headed for the little towns of Middletown and Hidden Valley Lake.  I had a nephew who lived in Hidden Valley Lake so I became more concerned.   At 2 A.M I watched in horror (on a live YouTube site) as within 16 minutes Middletown was wiped off the map.  Businesses, Schools, homes, church’s, Oak trees and Pines that were once there were now ashes as 2,000 to 3,000 degrees of heat went through Middletown.  I was only watching it on my computer but my heart was in my throat.  Within that 1st day and night, about 29,000 people were evacuated and after the fire was over and the people came back, many of them had nothing to come back to. 

  Over the next couple of weeks several evacuation and rescue stations were set up, usually at Fair Grounds from Napa to Ukiah and beyond.  Our Fair Grounds here in Ukiah was set up to take care of the many thousands of animals that were displaced, to care for and feed them.  And I believe 2 of them are still opened as well as the Indian Casinos in the area that was burned.

  If you would like to take a look at the fires extent you can go to YouTube and punch in “Valley Fire Lake County” or type that into your Internet browser.  I’m sure that you’ll get more then your share of sad information.  This one fire burned in a couple of days more then 126 square miles of territory and if the wind had of been blowing in the opposite direction, then very likely Ukiah would not be here.

   By the way, my nephew is safe.  He and his family got out of there by going up towards Clear Lake.  But 4 others were not.

Sunday, October 4, 2015

Medical History update

I think it's time to update my first blog on here.  To give a general picture of the things medically that I've gone through and am going through right at this moment.  So here goes:

March 1970:  I had an appendectomy.  It was operated on 5 days after the appendix ruptured.  Peritonitis (the poisons that happen after a ordeal like this) spread throughout my intestines and I had to have a foot and a half of my small intestines removed in the next 4 surgeries.  I was only 10 years old and 54 lbs at the time.  I stayed that weight for about a year afterward.  My temp, when my parents brought me into the hospital, was 107 to 108 and it stayed that way for a week.  In their efforts to bring my temp down the Doctors used medicines, an ice bed, and even a blood transfusion.  About a year later I had a massive Stroke.

April 1971:  An Ischemic Stroke happened in the left frontal lobe of my brain causing paralysis on my total right side.  It also caused 40% hearing loss (in one ear) and temporary sight impairment.  In fact, because of Bell's Palsy I have had real problems in controlling the right side of my face but the problems were more pronounced right after I had my stroke.  I couldn't see straight, I couldn't smile, I could hear but faintly and I have been left with the constant 'dribbling', even after all these years.   I have iEED, a loss of control of my emotions.  In other words, I cry at the most inappropriate times and for no reason.  I get mad at times and I get depressed at times too.  The depression has been medicated off and on for 45 years but as of right now I'm not on medication for depression.  I fall quite frequently but am walking under my own power.

June 1978:  I had 2 hernia operation, 1 on my appendectomy scar (the Dr. didn't sow it up right) and 1 in my groin.
June 1981:  I had 3 pneumothorax', spontaneously collapsed lung.  I was in the ICU for a month because it wouldn't stay inflated.

March 1984:  I started having grand mal seizures and I was put on 2 powerful medications (dilantin and phenobarbital) that took care of the seizures but took away all my dreams.  When it was found out that I also had Hep C in 1994 (I think) I was taken off the 2 meds and given 1,000 mg Tegratol daily.  My dreams came back with a killer vengeance..I could dream in color!  wow.  Over the years since then they've faded but I can still dream.  The Hep C is a result of the transfusion and has been in remissions for about a decade.  The seizures are a direct result of the Stroke, the scar tissue in my brain.

I've had other surgeries, 12 in all, 9 which could have killed me.  I am currently on monthly doses of proto-testosterone  to take care of my lethargy, my general lack of energy.  All in all, I'm in pretty good health, wouldn't you say?

It is Oct. 4, 2015 as I write these things.

Sunday, September 6, 2015

How old is Grandma?

How old is Grandma?
(Read this to the end- - quite an eye opener .)

Stay with this -- the answer is at the end... It will blow you away.

One evening a grandson was talking to his grandmother
About current events.
The grandson asked his grandmother what she thought
About the shootings at schools, the computer age, and
Just things in general.
The Grandmother replied, "Well, let me think a minute,

I was born before:

'
television
'
penicillin
'
polio shots
'
frozen foods
'
Xerox
'
contact lenses
'
Frisbees and
'
the pill

There were no:

'
credit cards
'
laser beams or
'
ball-point pens

Man had not
yet invented:

'
pantyhose
'
air conditioners
'
dishwashers
'
clothes dryers
'
and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and
'
man hadn't yet walked on the moon

Your Grandfather and I got married first, and then lived together.
Every family had a father and a mother.
Until I was 25, I called every man older than me, "Sir."
And after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man
With
a title, "Sir."
We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy.
Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense.
We were taught to know the difference between right and
Wrong
and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.

Serving your country was a privilege; living
in this country was
A bigger privilege.
We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.

Having a meaningful relationship
meant getting along with
Your cousins.
Draft dodgers were those who closed front doors as the
Evening breeze started.
Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the
Evenings
and weekends not purchasing condominiums.

We never heard of FM radios, tape decks , CD's, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.
We listened to Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios.
If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan ' on it, it was junk.

The term 'making out' referred to how
you did on your school exam.
Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.
We had 5 &10-cent (5 and dime) stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents.
Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel.
And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.
You could buy a new Ford Coupe for $600, but who could
Afford one? Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.


In my day:

'
"grass" was mowed,
'
"coke" was a cold drink,
'
"pot" was something your mother cooked in and
'
"rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby.
'
"Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office,
'
"chip" meant a piece of wood,
'
"hardware" was found in a hardware store and.
'
"software" wasn't even a word.

We were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby.
We volunteered to protect our precious country.
No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap.
How old do you think I am?
Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time.
Are you ready?????
This woman would be only
62
years old.She would have been born in late 1952.

GIVES YOU SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT.
PASS THIS ON TO THE OTHER OLD ONES. <BECAUSE THE YOUNG ONES WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT.>

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Broadway Villa Post Acute Care

Thursday, July 16, 2015 

  This is the ongoing report of my Dad's care.  Several days ago he was moved from the VA Hospital in San Francisco, Fort Miley to a rest home in Sonoma CA called Broadway Villa.  It is right next to the Sonoma TrainTown grounds and, Dad loving trains, he can hear the lonesome train whistle all day long.  I will be going down to see Dad on Saturday and Sunday with Mom and, I hope, my brother Tom.  Ever since he has been transferred there Mom and one of my sister have been helping him get settled in.  Mom says that he seems much more relaxed and at ease.  Dad has always been a people person and since it is an open rest home and on one floor, he can be out in the middle of all the action and not be in the way.  He loves to sit by a door and watch all the people, be they staff or Nurses or fellow inmates, doesn't matter...he's happy.  And the best part about this is the fact that Broadway Villa is about 15 minutes away from his home and Mom can be down there in a matter of minutes.  I'll write more after I go to see him.

Ed